My wife asked "what were you thinking!? Blue underwear under white shorts?"

I was thinking my pants weren't going to rip?

Tax day I got in my first round of the season at Forest Akers West. They were running a tax day $10.99 special for 18 holes. The cart was 9 bucks extra. My friends Darrell and Josh Wiles invited me to tag along. I brought my golf partner Pat Crandall with me so we could get used to each other. Our league begins Tuesday at Wheatfield Valley. I shot decent on the front. Better than I have EVER done at West. 4 holes in to the back 9, I jumped in the cart and heard a rip and felt a breeze blow on my backside. I knew right away and began making fun of myself about being fat. I tried to use up all the good jokes so they didn't have any ammunition. Guys are harsh on the golf course. For the next 5 holes, I would be bending over at least twice per hole, sticking out my big fat ass and expecting to hear about it. The guys were great and only mentioned it once. I couldn't believe Pat didn't have his foot on the dick pedal. I would have given him more grief than he gave me. Already, he is proving to be a fantastic partner.

Well, the round kind of went downhill after the rip. Plus, the CURSED Orange Wilson Smartcore ball Darrell gave me. I gave it back. Even he said it was cursed after trying to prove me wrong. Josh played it ok. I still believe it and all other orange balls are cursed and UNAMERICAN! I may have ripped them after he gave me the cursed ball?

I threw the shorts away when I got home, not thinking much of it. When I told Sabrina what had transpired, she was laughing hysterically. So, I shared the story on the air and now in print. Deb laughed just as hard as Sabrina. I got home on Friday and dug the shorts out of the trash for this picture. Good thing I was still wearing the underwear :)

From the Ripped Pants Stsh

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