Mega Millions Madness
The Mega Millions jackpot is near a record high...currently sitting, waiting for me at $636 Million!!! That's right, me. Why not me? Or you? Oh, to dream big...
We're looking at a 1 in nearly 260 million odds for a single one-dollar ticket to be a BIG winner!! Granted, the winner won't receive the full $636 Million...Uncle Sam will get his take, But, even still, the take home cash sum payment would be roughly $341 Million.
Now, what would I do with $341 Million? History suggests I will blow the whole damn thing, and sit next to Andre Rison on the next installment of ESPN's 30-for-30 "Broke" documentary. But, before that, there would be some good done. I have all ready made up my mind that one-third will go to charities that benefit local interests. (Capital Area Humane Society and United Way should be reeaaallllllly pulling for my numbers to pop up!!)
Another good chunk will likely be entrusted to Wall Street Weasels...after all "they" say that's the smart thing to do. Or, maybe I buy lots of GOLD!!! That sounds nice and survivalist of me...
And, of course, the selfish list...a nice, rural plot of land, ready to build a humble, meager abode...fully geared with a kick ass mancave equipped with a full bar, only two 42"+ HDTV's, PS4, and a high-tech, hi-fidelity sound system. Oh, yeah...and a heated pole barn. (To be extra survivalist...of course a 10 story bomb shelter would have to be included...) No fancy rides, just a nice sedan, a truck for Michigan weather (that's right, I ain't migrating anywhere!!!!), and a utility vehicle to plow the damn snow!!
I'm not that selfish...I just want to be in a place where I can do what I do best for the rest of my life...BE LAZY!!! Don't worry, mom and dad...I'll make sure you're good to go to, as well!!
...and, of course, I'd have to channel my inner-Spicoli. I'd have to hire Van Halen to play my birthday party!! How about you? What dreams would you like to turn your one dollar into? Good luck to you tonight!! But, more to me!!!!! And, if nobody wins...we maybe talking about BILLIONS come Friday.