Detroit Porch Pirates Literally Steal Woman’s Whole Porch
At least we can say they were really dedicated to their craft...
You know, I already don't understand the appeal of porch piracy. I guess it's the thrill of not knowing what you're going to get when you do it the usual way of stealing random packages from people's property.
However, what kind of animal just takes a whole entire porch!?
According to Daily Mail, citing The Shade Room (TSR) that's what happened to India Gardner in Detroit while she was at work at the Chrysler plant recently.
Just imagine coming home after a long day of work only to find something like YOUR PORCH missing.
Now Gardner figured people would not believe her so she took a video and shared "before-and-after" photos of the missing green steps (and even the railing):
With normal porch-piracy you normally just have to cut your losses and re-buy whatever it was you were expecting but in Gardner's case, "I didn't know I would be buying a porch you know," she said. "It's funny but it's not lol. I'm laughing but I'm pissed lol."
As if this story couldn't get any crazier, Gardner's neighbors told her they hadn't seen anybody messing with her porch either. My only question to that is HOW!?
How can not a single, solitary person not notice someone's entire porch being lifted up and carried away?
Since Gardner's story has made the rounds, she has been able to laugh about the situation, get a Bernie Sanders meme shirt out of it and has started a GoFundMe to raise the expected $1,000-1200 it will take to replace the porch.
She is filing a police report so we guess all is well that ends well but now, instead of taking extra measures to make sure your packages are safe, you may want to start locking down your porches as well!
While we do not have any more tips on how to prevent your porch being stolen, here are a few tips to prevent your run-of-the-mill porch piracy: