Is it too much to ask for a real deli in Lansing?

It's been a minute since I've gone off on a opinionated rant. My stomach is speaking to me today with frustration. Really, all I want is a real deli, to get a real sandwich...no subs, no hoagies, a sandwich. Maybe even rye bread. Hell, I'd be happy with a freshly baked bagel topped with muenster cheese, cole slaw, and a slice of turkey.

But, nooooooo...not in Lansing. The sheeple won't have it!

You see, I grew up in Haslett, fortunate enough to have Bagel-Haul Delicatessen available for lunch or dinner, right down the street from school and home. And, yes, I was spoiled...we all were spoiled. They had the freshest cold cuts in all of Metro Lansing, the best bagels this side of New York, and fresh choices for liquid refreshment. (What the hell ever happened to New York Seltzer anyways?) Nothing like this exists anymore. The chain bagel shops close to MSU are OK, but they just can't hit the spot like the old Bagel-Haul. And, they sure as hell aren't going to serve up a corned beef and pastrami on rye with Russian or Thousand Island, swiss or muenster, or spicy mustard...you get it. Big city style.
Now, I do have to give credit where credit is due. State Side Deli still has one area location in Okemos, but they close at 4:00pm everyday. They are delicious! They feed the crave, if I get there before their ridiculously early closing time.

I love my sub sandwiches and grinders like everybody else in this area. But, for the love of almighty, corned beef belongs on rye, not hard, borderline stale italian longbread. And, no, your new favorite flatbread sandwich is not hip eating. It's the fool's gold of healthy eating.

Help me out, Lansing!! You have pointed me to hand-dipped ice cream in the past. Where is the monster, city-style sandwich hiding 'round these parts?